Why don’t more males learn how to dance?
I can’t think of an easier, more casual way to get a beautiful woman in your arms. It is by far the fastest way to get close to someone; both physically and emotionally.
It’s not just about grabbing someone’s hand and steering them around the dance floor, or bumpin’ uglies to club music; it’s a mental connection. You can tell more about a person and how they feel by the way they dance with you, than by trying to have a conversation with them over a blaring bass.
Perhaps that’s why some guys are afraid to dance – it’s very close, and such a close connection can sometimes be nerve-racking.
But I suspect that it’s less of a personal bubble issue and more of a self-esteem issue.
Men are afraid to dance. They say it’s stupid, but what they really mean is that they “feel” stupid doing it. It’s a shame, because women love to dance – especially after a few drinks.
Forget Justin Timberlake and Michael Jackson. Forget poppin’ n’ lockin’. Forget what you see on MTV. These types of dance are for entertainment purposes.
Most women can’t dance like this, so it’s not like they think any less of a man who hasn’t mastered the moonwalk.
Ladies want someone to dance with them.
The foundations of partner dancing tap into three very important areas of the female psyche. First of all, women love to be flattered. Second of all, women like to be around men who make them feel safe. Third, and most important, women like to be made to feel special.
The easiest way to accomplish all of this is to pick a partner dance and then get really good at it.
In traditional ballroom and Latin dance, there is a lead and there is a follow. It doesn’t matter which gender assumes which role, but usually the man is the lead. His role is to control the movements of the female’s body. His own movements suggest where she should place her feet, how to move her hips and when to spin. To anyone who thinks this sounds sexist or overtly sexual, I urge you to get over yourself.
Partner dancing is the epitome of considerate conduct. It’s a sensitive, bodily conversation that requires a real knack for listening and observing. Pleasurable partner dancing can only be accomplished when both people are tuned into each other’s feelings and gestures.
One of the most challenging, but rewarding partner dances is Argentinean Social Tango. This dance is the real deal. What most people call to mind when they think of Tango is actually Stage Tango, a highly dramatic version of Tango meant for entertainment. Social Tango is for real people and it can be danced to absolutely any music – even country.
It’s a basic dance that involves a close, rounded embrace and a high level of dependence between the lead and the follow. The result is beautiful, poignant and very sexy.
Anyone interested in learning can go to the Iron Horse every Sunday afternoon for free lessons.
So guys, please stop being wallflowers. Seriously. Stop. We ladies want you to dance with us.
If you guys want our affection, you don’t have to be gorgeous. You don’t even need to be rich. You just need two legs, and the confidence to make us look great on the dance floor.
Noura Alfadl-Andreasson * A&E Editor
Dan
September 12, 2011 at 9:29 pm
What time on Sunday’s?
Noura
September 13, 2011 at 7:43 pm
Drop in anytime between 2 p.m. and 7 p.m. Dave, the instructor, will be there.
Dernell
October 15, 2011 at 3:38 am
This info is the cat’s pjaamas!
A Different Dan
September 15, 2011 at 11:33 pm
It’s harder to lead than follow and many men just don’t consider it worth the effort.
Noura
September 17, 2011 at 7:12 pm
That’s very true. I suppose I just like the men who make the effort. But everyone’s different.
Anonymous
September 26, 2011 at 6:21 pm
There is a certain girl I have watched (frequently in a white dress) that made tango look effortless. I am going to make the effort for effortlessness as well. I think she was Brazilian, Puerto Rican or maybe Venezuelan, maybe part Eskimo. Whatever she is she’s beautiful.
phoenix
October 5, 2011 at 6:30 am
I have been dancing Latin for many years and I have to agree, WE NEED MORE DANCE PARTNERS! I mean the guys really need to step it up and stop being BOYS and start being MEN. I have done all types of Latin dances, now its on to the Argentina Tango– the one dance that made me want to learn how to dance when i was 9. If only i could find a partner -.-
Noura Alfadl-Andreasson
October 5, 2011 at 3:19 pm
I feel your pain. Tango dance partners are out there! They are just hard to find. Sometimes you have to recruit men into it. You should check out the tango lessons at the Iron Horse on Sherman Ave. on Sundays, 2p.m.-7p.m. There are also lessons in Spokane at the Magic Lantern Theater on Main St. & Brown St. from 2p.m.-7p.m. on Saturdays. The instructor David is a real sweetheart and he can set you up with all sorts of Tango information and events.
Benaiah
October 6, 2011 at 6:55 am
I really like this article. I think more men should learn to dance. I love to dance. I don’t know how to dance the tango, but mi familia y amigos have taught me to salsa. It’s so much fun!
Anonymous
October 13, 2011 at 7:11 pm
I think more women should learn to follow
Noura Alfadl-Andreasson
October 14, 2011 at 7:52 am
I think more men should learn how to lead
Kapri
October 15, 2011 at 1:14 am
No more s***. All posts of this qlauity from now on
Noura Alfadl-Andreasson
October 8, 2011 at 8:14 pm
Ensename a bailar salsa!
Noura Alfadl-Andreasson
October 28, 2011 at 6:52 pm
Additional (free) tango sessions going on every Tuesday at Lemongrass restaurant (3rd and Sherman Ave. Coeur d’Alene) from 6p.m.-9p.m. Great music, food and venue!